We went out to eat as a family the other day and as we were all piling out of the car a girl ran up and said to my oldest daughter, "Is your name Caitlin?" Caitlin nodded and said yes. This girl then said, "We used to play together at School X elementary and on the playground". I am very rarely at a loss for words, in fact I talk entirely too much but I was struck mute for at least 15 seconds (a record).
This girl looked at least 16 or 17, was leaning up against some boys car when we parked in front of the restaurant, and was dressed like your average lady of the night - daisy dukes, tank top, heavy, heavy eye makeup, and very large earrings. All I could think was when the eff did you and my daughter play - were you her tutor? So I finally regained my tongue and asked her what grade she was in now. The hoochie chick was 12!!!! She was only one grade ahead of my daughter and less than one year older.
Sweet baby jesus. What happened to this little girl? How could her and my daughter be so close in age and be so completely different? I still have to remind my daughter to brush her hair and this girl is obviously using more beauty products than I do. Why is there such a deep divide among young girls in maturity. The sad thing is that this young hoochie girl represents the status quo for her age much more than my child. Our young girls are becoming much too sexualized at younger and younger ages.
Does this little girl have someone in her life to tell her that she is beautiful and worthy of respect? Does she have someone who will forcefully tell the man in the Camaro that she is 12 and to stay the hell away from her. Does she have someone to ask where she is going and who with and when she will be back? Does she have anyone to talk to her about sex and love and respect? Does she have anyone to tell her how smart and worthy and amazing she is and that her validation comes from who she is as a child of God and not what the boy down the street thinks of her. I hope she does have at least one person that gives her that support but I am afraid she doesn't.
When Caitlin was in the NICU her "suite mate" was a little boy named Ethan. For several months their isolettes were in the same room and day after day I saw this little boy in his bed with no visitors. Despite the rules, after spending time with my daughter I would rescrub up, regown and talk to this little boy, hold his feet and hands, and hope for him. The night before we took Caitlin home I dreamt that I snuck Ethan out in a little shoe box - I wanted to bring him home with me so badly. This young girl certainly couldn't fit in a little shoe box but I had that same urge to steal her away and take her home. To a place where she would be noticed and valued and hoped for.
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3 comments:
Oft times the parents are unaware as the children sneak clothes, from God knows where, out of the house and apply the makeup when they are well away from the prying eyes of their parents.
Of course, I agree, at 12 years of age exactly where were these parents? My heart goes out to the young girl and the experiences that lie ahead for her but sometimes the parents/parent have no idea. Sometimes, they bring them to an activity looking one way, and when their backs are turned, everything changes. It's sad but it's true.
OMG unbelievable. I agree that kids can do some sneaky stuff, but Hooching on a Camaro at 12? Surely the parents know where their 12 year old is? I could understand a 15-16 year old sneaking around like that, they have access to cars...but 12.
Maybe it was her Halloween costume?
I am so trying to teach my boys that all girls are someone's daughter, sister, mother and they need to respect them. That girls who respect themselves wouldn't dress like that or feel the need to inappropriately flaunt their sexuality. Oh so trying to teach these boys right. Lord help me teach them!
Love on thise precious girls of yours!!! They are going to be a light to their peers!
Mom - I agree when the kid is 15, 16 even 14. When I see some hoochified kid at that age I just assume that they changed after they left the house, etc. And the parents think their kid is at math tutoring and she is not. Older kids have more freedom and with that freedom comes the ability to pull the wool over their parents eyes.
But at 12? If the parents have no idea then that might be part of the problem.
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